This is one of my favorite poems. It is often read at wedding ceremonies. It's from Khalil Gibran On Marriage:
...But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
Two weeks ago, I attended the Cannabis Wedding Expo in Denver, CO. This event was the first of its kind and showcased the diverse facets of the cannabis wedding industry. I had the distinct privilege of attending as a guest speaker, but mostly I was there to learn. When some folks first hear of cannabis weddings, they gasp in horror at the idea of their conservative relatives being exposed to such things. Others see it as a welcome addition to the pervasive trend of alcohol consumption.Read more
We live in an alcohol dominated culture. Most magazines feature ads for liquor, grocery stores are stocked with alcohol (in many states), and one of the most ubiquitous pick up lines is, “May I buy you a drink?” Social outings and meet and greet events are often held in bars, and for that reason I often dread them. Each time someone offers to get me a drink and I politely decline, they look puzzled. Sometimes they even look concerned. “Oh are you sober?” they inquire. “No,” I reply. “I prefer cannabis to alcohol.” At this point, they tend to either become uncomfortable and sputter something incomprehensible about a bad experience with cannabis or they lament that cannabis isn’t readily available in the space.Read more
Historically, I've had problems with expectations. I get excited about something, create grand sweeping expectations, and inevitably feel frustrated when the reality cannot come close to the fantasy I've envisioned. For the first time in my life, I had an experience that was even better in practice than what I had imagined in my brain. Seriously. We used 11 condoms in 24 hours. That's a personal record. We spent the entire weekend doing nothing but finding the answers to this question:
What would bring you the most pleasure in this moment?Read more
Imagine the joyful feeling you experience when you walk into your local dispensary, inhale the sweet flower aromas, pick out exactly what you want, and walk out with your favorite product. Now imagine you have a partner who is at best indifferent to your imbibing and at worst utterly unsupportive. How do you navigate discordant cannabis use in relationships? There is always the option to only date fellow cannabis users, and with dating apps like High There it’s much easier to find like-minded prospective partners. However, if you’ve found yourself in a relationship with a non-user and intend to continue that relationship, or have met someone who is well suited to you on most things besides this, here are some suggestions.
When I tell people that I write about sex and cannabis, I get one of two replies: “I’ve never tried that,” or “OMG I have such intensely awesome sex when I’m high!” I fall into the latter camp. How can you utilize cannabis to make your sex life even more fantastic? Here are a few suggestions from your favorite sex educator:Read more
At one point or another, we’ve all gotten stuck in our heads during sex. “Am I taking too long to orgasm?” “What if I ejaculate too quickly?” “Is my partner having fun?” “I feel bloated.” “I forgot to shave.” “I’m too big.” “I’m too small.” The negative self talk can invade our brains and bombard us with anxiety-inducing self doubt. Luckily, science, communication, and CBD can help.Read more
All bodies deserve pleasure. That’s a sentiment most of us can support. So when your body experiences chronic pain or a disability with pain as a side effect, facilitating pleasure can be complicated.
Earlier this year, Lisa Rough highlighted some research which suggests that cannabis use can be an effective substitute for opiate pain relievers. She pointed out that “More than 1.5 billion people in the world and an estimated 116 million Americans regularly suffer from chronic pain.” Introducing cannabinoids into your sex life can help decrease pain and increase pleasure, whether you’re having solo or partnered sex.Read more